Tag: body horrors

WELL i just had my first-ever cramp so severe i literally yelled out loud, doubled up in place, and had to lie on the floor, so in light of that, some reviews.

PAINKILLERS: GOOD

BAG FULL OF HOT WATER: GOOD

ROOMMATE WHO BRINGS YOU THE AFOREMENTIONED ITEMS: GOOD

HORMONAL IUD: BAD???

when i’m tired, specifically when i’m sleep deprived and it’s the middle of the day, i feel cold; and it’s real cold in that a sweater or being outside in the sun or getting a hug from a warm person helps, but it also feels weirdly distinct from “real” environmental cold. specifically it feels like the coldness is inside me, just under my skin– or rather, my body is wrapped around the coldness like a blocky, ill-fitting rubber sheath, covering it mostly but not entirely, so that i’m always slightly to the left of myself because i’m being displaced by cold

every day is cr/mps. or h**d*che but cr/mps is worse bc doing things that feel like they should help doesn’t help, whereas everyone knows h**d*che is an inviolable creation of G-d & impervious to human efforts at appeasement

i think of myself as being– ok, no, i was going to say “small” or something just to set up the mild experience of surprise but that’s not true. i think of myself as a collection of extended oscillating polygons.